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    Sexual Innuendos from a Coworker

    Posted by: dreamweaver1177
    Date: 9/11/2007 11:23:46 PM

    I have worked with this coworker for over two years and we have been good friends, working on projects together, discussing family and friends, just communicating on a daily basis.

    But recently we had a farewell party for another coworker and this coworker and i were talking where he explained he had a crush on me and made a few sexual comments...mind you we are both married happily (at least i am).

    Since that night, i have been more or less ignoring him. i just dont know what to do...he has been a great friend and had a bit much to drink that night, however i get disgusted when i have to work with him.

    I dont know what i should do...any suggestions?

    thanks.



    Reply from: cna
    Date: 9/18/2007 3:35:00 AM
    Reply: Consider talking to him in private when you have enough time to say, and ask him what you need to so you can feel more comfortable around him. If he tells you he meant what he said at the party, simply tell him you are happily married and you're not interested in having any type of relationship with him outside of your working environment. Be firm but not angry when you talk to him. If he tells you again he's interested in a romantic relationship or makes more verbal remarks, (like the night he was drunk) - be VERY firm. Tell him you won't tolerate him talking to you that way. A very important thing to do, (start now), is to literally document every interaction with him - in case this situation continues to escalate. Remember, there are laws that protect both men and women in the workplace regarding sexual advances, dirty jokes, using offensive language, etc. Only you can decide when (and if) to go to your boss to report this - if it continues. If you confront him, (and remind him) about what he said the night he was drunk at the party, then, you can take it from there. He might apologize, he might be embarrassed, or he might claim he doesn't remember ever saying those things to you. But you remember. Document, document, document. Dates, day of week, year, time of day and where you both were when or if he utters another word to you that you are uncomfortable with. Tell him to STOP. If you don't flat out TELL him, and you remain silent, he will get the idea that you might be considering what he's asking of you. Be brave and persistent. Personally, if this guy had said 'those things' to me - he would have been standing in the unemployment line the very next working day. You can do this.

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