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Key Books
Adult Bullying: Perpetrators and Victims
Fighting Back: Overcoming Bullying in the Workplace
Harassment, Bullying and Violence at Work: A Practical Guide to Combating Employee Abuse in the Workplace
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BULLY BOSS
Posted by: chklop
Date: 8/31/2004 3:25:32 PM
My supervisor has a reputation for being rude, bullying and unprofessional with clients. It has been hard with her in the past to keep employees in her department. She is very insecure and constantly needs her ego stroked or she gets QUITE unpleasant. I recently ran into her and her husband at the local county fair, which I was attending with my daughter (3). She saw me riding the merry go round with her and shouted sarcastically to me, "Oh! Did they find a horse BIG enough for you?" Beside the shock I kept my mouth shut for the sake of my daughter (mind you I am maybe 10-15 lbs overweight, while she is atleast 50-60 lbs above her ideal.) The following Monday as she past me on her way into the office she said, "Oh, I see you made it. You didn't crack the horse did you?" I ignored her comment and walked away. While she can say she was just joking, we KNOW she only feels good when she is belittling others. I feel as though I am a target. Do I have to take this
| Reply from: |
abog25 |
| Date: |
10/14/2004 2:12:00 AM |
| Reply: |
First of all try not to act on your assumptions - you can't "know" that she "only feels good when she is belittling others". The fact is, she said something that bothered you, and you let her. (I'm not criticizing you, just pointing out that's the choice YOU made). Consciously or unconsciously, you have taught her a lesson - that she can belittle you AND get away with it. One of the easiest and LEAST confrontational ways to start dealing with that kind of behaviour is just to call her on it: "Pardon me? Did you say what I think you said?" or "Excuse me, I'm not sure I understand what you are trying to say"...It's pretty common this kind of 'sniper' to fall back on the "can't you take a joke"....if she pulls that, be very 'sweet' and say something like "Well Mary, I know you have a great sense of humour (gag) but I'm really very sensitive about my weight...or some such. |
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| Reply from: |
bonedude |
| Date: |
1/25/2005 8:59:00 PM |
| Reply: |
in had a bully boss .every day when i reported daily logs to him he would rant and rave about how ignorant and stupid drivers were and come down on me for the trucks daily repairs.1 hour of this every day started getting old.my shift ended at 4.30 and his started at 3.30.one day i was grading the parking lot with new rocks and he pulls up and parks where i was working.when i asked him to move his truck (2 times )both times he responded with "get the @#$%^&*(away from me".i asked him what his problem was .and he hit me .i beat the living crap out of him and he said i hit him first.the cops are no help they believe him too.he quit a short time later .i got fired by him that day.by him no less .what should i have done?
what can i do now.i got another job about 3 days later but it still makes me mad that a geek can bully around people in the workplace and get away with it.that anger is stressing me out at my new job.in a privately owned company i have no legal recourse.im still mad.and can do nothing.yet...
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| Reply from: |
alphazulu |
| Date: |
8/2/2005 3:49:00 PM |
| Reply: |
Well when you say he 'hit' you was it an actual hit or a push. Either way if you didn't fight back you could have pressed charges and sued the company. Personally if my tyrant boss ever swings at me I'll definaltly fight back in self defense but not over kill it. I know its hard not to fight back but if you dont and there are witnesses you would have had it made. Otherwise its his word againt yours. If I was in your shoes I would have been smilling ear to ear anyways cause the SOB sounds like he had it coming and you taught him a lesson. Good Job! |
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| Reply from: |
caz |
| Date: |
12/7/2005 11:40:00 PM |
| Reply: |
my boss is a bully, nice as pie in front of others (thats how they are though) but freadful and rude and intimidating on a one to one, ive never been in such an enviroment as i am now. Its such a hard thing to prove though dont you find? unless friends will back us up as they know whats going on.....what can we all do? There are many new laws out now against bullying ect but its proving it thats the hard bit. |
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| Reply from: |
jassm |
| Date: |
5/17/2006 1:20:00 PM |
| Reply: |
Been at my job 25 yrs. I'm 55 now & have 2 new younger female empolees. I'm over them but I feel like (know) that they are sucking up to the boss. It's so overwhelimg, making me miserable. I won't go into all the things that are happing, guess I'm losing my job cause I can't compete with these girls, any suggestions?????? Thanks!! |
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| Reply from: |
michelle |
| Date: |
2/20/2007 7:43:00 AM |
| Reply: |
I completely understand what you must be going through...have been through a similar position myself...
All I can do to cheer you up is offer you a suggestion...that can help you win $600! Try making a video on this theme and get it registered at International Ass Kisser's Association's video contest by March 15, 2007. The, tell everyone you know to go to the site and vote for you, starting December 15, 2007 when the voting opens. For details check out http://www.akisser.com/video.php.
Top video that receives the highest score will be awarded $600 and the runner-up $400!
Cheers! ;) |
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| Reply from: |
Juggalette92 |
| Date: |
7/25/2007 10:29:00 AM |
| Reply: |
Don't let this rude woman ruin your life. As everyone says, one day she's going to run off her flabby mouth to the wrong person and she's going to get a rather unpleasant response. Letting her know that she is upseting you is only going to make matters worse because she'll feel that she has the control she wants. Just reply to her negative comments with light comical statements or short, yet unoffensive responses. For example, when she made the comment on the horse breaking, you could say, "Well, I haven't gotten a damage repairment bill yet, so I guess not." Then just walk away without saying another word. Trust me, this works. |
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| Reply from: |
Madison |
| Date: |
12/26/2007 10:52:00 PM |
| Reply: |
For the last year, I have been bullied by the Stockroom Team Lead (of a major uniform rental company)and my supervisor. They made me into the Stockroom Scapegoat witout a second's thought and ruined my reputation. I have put up with more harassement than any good person should have to. There are probably reasons why they are both divoriced. It's hard to find a job without experience nowadays and when you do find one you should not be forced to leave because you are being harrassed at work, which happens to be illegal. |
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