Then Why Did You Ask Me?

I assist a co-worker who is very bright, articulate, and has been doing her job well for about 10 years. She knows a lot, is extremely competent, and in fact I quite like her.

The problem is, when she asks me to research a topic or the solution to a problem, she seldom listens to what I've found. Just this morning, I began to explain the results of such research to her and she said, "I already know what you're going to say--here's what we're gonna do". In fact, she didn't know what I was going to say. Now, in implementing her solution, I have a question but I'm reluctant to ask her because it was part of the material I was going to present to her initially before she just blew my efforts off. I'm irritated when she asks me to find something out and then responds as though she already knew it.

I like this co-worker a lot as a person, and I enjoy the work, but I don't know how to handle this problem.

Reply from:	smz
Date:	7/11/2004 7:51:00 PM
Reply:	Have you just started there? It is possible she has been on her own that she has go head first on all projects. Please sit down with her at lunch or out for a break, explain you are here for her but you feel you are talking to a wall. You need to know how she wants the information SHE REQUESTED give to her. It is possible she wants daily updates. If it contuines to be a problem see how the other people are delivering their input to her and copy them. I have been in a job for 8 years and I know I just react to problems by the seat of my pants and don't ask for help. It is possible that she is doing that without realizing it. Good Luck

Reply from:	bonedude
Date:	1/25/2005 9:26:00 PM
Reply:	if it is extra work on top of your regular schedule why are you doing it?

Reply from:	ana
Date:	3/3/2005 6:01:00 PM
Reply:	I think that woman is impatient/anxious. She may be an overachiever (a competent one) that has problems trusting other people. It is probably a good idea to document all you finding - yes it is tedious- but you want to make sure that she gets how much you are working. Look for a good moment to present your findings - do a subtle network with her - some small talk to find out when she is more relaxed, and then get into the habit of presenting your work on those ocassions. she maybe even open for suggestions when she is relaxed.

Reply from:	Juggalette92
Date:	7/25/2007 10:42:00 AM
Reply:	Maybe you should tell her how you feel. If you've tried that, then, well, I'm stumped. But my best wishes. I hope you can work this out.

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